Dreams to Reality
Part 1/6 plus the Epilogue-so technically is 1/7
All rights reserved by StormyNite

It was almost dawn when she pushed the up button on the lift.   She was tired 
and more than a little depressed.  It had been the third murder this week done 
by a close family member.  It was disheartening to think that pulling out a gun 
was the answer to an argument.   Maybe a movie and Nick's company would 
lighten her mood a bit.  Natalie double checked the contents of her bag as the 
lift stopped to make sure she got the right kind of popcorn.  Nick would be 
cutting it close this morning with the meeting the Captain had called at the last 
minute.

As she stepped out of the lift, a flash of something shiny caught her eye.  She 
dropped the bag and lunged sideways by instinct alone.  In seconds he was on 
her.  He grabbed her hair and growled as he jerked her towards him.  When he 
pulled, she lifted her knee to his groin and put all her strength into it.  He 
howled in pain when her knee made contact.  He doubled over in agony 
cradling himself, yet didn't release her hair.  She screamed and lunged away in 
spite of his restraint.  He grasped at her neck futilely slicing the side of it with 
his long nails, then she pulled free and ran for the stairs.  She just reached the
handle of the door, when his body slammed hers to the floor.  The force of her 
head against the floor was more than her mortal body could handle and blissful 
darkness claimed her.

"You will pay for that, bitch!"  He twisted her unconscious neck around toward 
him and seemed fascinated by the blood pooling in the wound on her neck.  He 
licked his lips unconsciously, then heard the garage downstairs open.

---------------

Nick pulled the caddie into the garage and smiled as he passed Nat's car sitting 
quietly outside.  They'd been so busy lately, there just hadn't been any time for 
relaxation.  Nat was depressed about more than the homicides.  She hadn't said 
it, but there was something more bothering her about the rash of family related 
murders than she was admitting. Maybe he could get her to talk about it.  
Maybe they both needed to talk about it.  After all, that's what friends did for 
each other.  He let himself drift back to Valentines Day and the memories of 
her in his arms, then the ache that could never be healed engulfed him.  He 
wanted more from Natalie, and so did she.  They both knew it but it was to
dangerous.  He wasn't being fair to her, but he just couldn't walk away.  He 
shook his head in disgust at his own weakness and pressed the up button on the 
lift.  He could feel her heartbeat, but it seemed really erratic.  Something was 
wrong.

He threw open the door.  Fresh blood assailed him.  Blood wine from his 
refrigerator had been smashed all over the floor and more.  "Nat!"  Nick
screamed and searched for her heartbeat.  He found her unconscious on
the floor by the door.

"Nat?"  He picked her up and cradled her in his arms.  The wound on her neck 
bled freely and he quickly ripped a piece of his shirt to staunch the blood flow.  
She moaned softly and called his name when he applied the pressure.  "Hang 
on, Nat!  Hang on!"  Quickly he scanned the room for other heartbeats as the 
automatic shutters kicked on signaling the onset of another sunny day.  Nick 
picked Natalie up and headed for the couch.  Trying to hold her and keep 
pressure on the wound in her neck with one hand, he reached for the phone 
with the other.  He dialed 911 and gave his address.  He didn't dare release the 
security locks below, but he had no choice if the paramedics were to get in.  
"Tell them to come in and take the lift to the second floor....and hurry, she's
bleeding badly."  Fear gripped his heart as he held her in his arms.  Her 
heartbeat was so erratic but the blood flow had almost stopped.  He pulled his 
makeshift bandage away from the wound to look at it.  The wounds were deep 
and would have been fatal if an inch further to the right.  She'd fought them 
with all her might or she wouldn't be alive. How did they get in?  There was 
one answer and the blood wine all over the floor signaled rage.  Was it 
LaCroix, or had the Enforcers finally reached their limit with him?  But why 
stop?  Was this a warning?

Her blood called to him as well as his heart.  Here was the woman he loved 
more than life bleeding in his arms, and he couldn't do anything about it 
because of the blasted sun.  Nick pulled her tight in her arms and rocked her 
like a child as he waited for the ambulance and cursed his weakness.  "Come 
on, Nat, stay with me."  Gently he pulled her hair away from the wound, trying 
to keep her comfortable.  Her blood seeped through the make shift bandage 
onto his fingers.  The warmth of her blood beckoned to him and he seemed 
mesmerized by the feel of it on his skin.  Just one taste and he would know 
what was wrong....who had done this.  Just one taste and he could help her, he 
could tell them how bad she was.  Where to look, what the real problem 
was....just one taste.  His fingers were to his lips before he realized and he 
tasted the one thing he'd forbidden himself since meeting her.

The salty taste of her blood enticed him and he licked his finger without 
thinking.  Warmth and pain washed over him and he pushed into the feeling 
and let himself become one with the essence of Natalie.  Her body was 
responding to him, his comfort, his strength.  The wound on her neck was 
beginning to close, but she fought for consciousness from the blow to the head.  
Nick wanted more, he wanted to feel all of her.   He stared at the wound on her 
neck in need and his eyes began to glow.  If he licked the wound it would heal, 
but could he stop.  Could he not take her knowing how she felt about him?  He 
felt his fangs drop and he knew the answer.  Instead of biting her, he pulled her 
tight against him and fought his own beast.  Where were the paramedics?  
"Come on, Nat. You're going to be alright.  I'm right here."  He ran his hand 
through  her hair as he cradled her in his arms and forced the vampire back 
into submission.

Her blood called to him like nothing he'd ever felt before, so he gave into it and 
pushed into her memories as he rocked her in his arms waiting for help.  Her 
memories became his.  The pain of losing her brother, Roger Jameison, the 
crazy bomber at the precinct, and Valentines day.  She remembered Valentines 
Day, and she'd kept it from him.  The pain his words caused and his subsequent 
withdrawal from  her, the loss of his love, her feeling of inequity.  The feeling 
that she wasn't good enough for him, wasn't pretty enough, the desire to be
intimate and fulfill their relationship, the frustration and anger all engulfed 
him like a storm.  He pushed further into her memories unable to stop.  Her 
love for him overwhelmed him until he gasped in the pleasure of it, then he 
found the vampire returning. He found himself drawn to her neck, the images 
flashing in his mind and he wanted more.  Just one more taste, and he would be 
one with her.  Then the child appeared running after him.  His child, she 
wanted his child, a child created in love.

"Nat!"  He whispered in frustration and anger as he buried his head in her hair.  
"What have I done to you, Nat?"  Blood tears ran freely down his cheeks and he 
wept for both their losses.  He tried to stop the images but he couldn't.  Her past 
washed over him until the fear she felt tonight overwhelmed him.  He was one 
with her fear that it was a vampire that attacked her.  That she would be made 
into a creature of the night against her will.  She feared the evil, the anger, the
killing, the loss of her humanity.  She wasn't ready to give it up. "I won't let 
them harm you, Nat.  I won't let you lose your dreams.  I promise."  He 
whispered into her ear and he held her tight in his arms.  Blood tears flowed 
freely and he heard the lift kick on.  Quickly he wiped his face and picked her 
up.  The paramedic entered pulling the stretcher.  He laid her down gently.

"You need to step back now, Sir.  We can take care of her."  The paramedic 
pushed Nick away gently and went to work.  One checked the wound as the 
other checked vital signs.  With that done, they set an IV and called the 
hospital with her stats.  They were efficient, caring and gentle while Nick felt 
helpless as they worked on her.  Once they'd stabilized her, they began 
strapping her down snuggly to the gurney for transport.  "We are going to take 
her to the hospital now, Sir.  You can follow in the car."

"I'm going with you."  Fear of losing her forever was written clearly on his face. 
The paramedics had seen it thousands times before. "I'm sorry, Sir, but you 
can't ride with us....."  Within seconds, the paramedic felt sucked into the man's 
eyes and he was lost.  Minutes later, they were all four in the back of the 
ambulance on the way to the hospital.  Harry shook his head to clear the fog 
that had overcome him and stared at the blond man holding the woman's hand 
as the siren blared loudly through the streets.  How did that happen?  He'd 
never broken the rules before.  There would be hell to pay for this one.  Joe, his
partner, seemed to be a little disoriented and amazed as well when their eyes 
met.   At least the guy wasn't irrational.  He was very calm and Harry had to 
admit, the woman seemed to breathe easier when he held her hand.

They pulled into the enclosed circle of the emergency entrance and the doors 
burst open.  They unloaded Natalie with smooth quick efficiency while Nick 
never released her hand as they proceeded into the hospital. The sun was 
blocked by the building when they rolled swiftly into triage.

"You will have to release her hand now, Sir."  The nurse said softly pulling 
Nick's hand free from Nat's.  "We'll take good care of her.  You go over to the 
admitting desk and give them all the information.  We'll let you know how she 
is as soon as possible."  Her kind eyes met his pain-filled blue ones. "She'll be 
fine.  She's in the best hands, Sir."

Nick felt hollow when he released her hand, but his subconscious mind had 
responded.  "She hit her head on the floor during the attack.  I think she has a 
concussion.....she's lost a lot of blood from her neck...."  His voice cracked as he 
spoke.  "She's AB negative, her name's Natalie Lambert, she's an ME for the 
city....."

The nurse touched his arm in comfort.  "Her name's Natalie.....I'll tell 
them.....she'll be fine, Sir. You tell all that to the nurse over there."  She 
pointed to the admission desk.  "We'll let you know as soon as we find out 
anything."  She smiled and took off down the hall after the stretcher being 
rolled into emergency room four.



Part 2



----------

Schanke ran down the hall to room 422 on the main floor.  A policeman, in full 
uniform, stood guard outside Nat's room .   He nodded to Officer Cameron in 
acknowledgment and pushed into the room.  The blinds were shut and Nick sat 
silently by Nat's bed watching her intently.  The monitors hummed and clicked 
above their heads as the blood in the bag above Nat slowly added the life giving 
energy back to her body.  Schanke had been in enough hospitals to know the 
signs of severe trauma and read the monitors.  Nat's vital signs were stable and 
she seemed to be breathing okay without any assistance.  Nick looked like hell.  
He'd been with her all day.  

"Nick?"  Schanke spoke softly.  He wasn't sure Nick even knew he was there.  
He walked quickly to his side and knelt down in front of him.  Nick's eyes 
never left Natalie. <Friends....yeah, right....who were they kidding on that 
one?>  "Nick, she's going to be alright.  I talked with the doctors."  He touched 
his arm to try and bring him back from wherever he was.  "Come on, Nick.  I 
need your help on this one." Nick finally turned his attention to his partner.  
The mask of indifference that Nick mastered so effectively was gone.  
Schanke's heart lurched when he saw the pain and guilt etched into his 
partner's eyes.  "Nick, this isn't your fault."

Nick turned back to Nat before he spoke.  "Then whose fault is it, Schank?  
They did this to her because of me.  Because of what I am."  He finally turned 
back to Schanke.  "They hurt her to get to me.  Tell me whose fault that is."  
Nick stood up and brushed Schanke off as he tried to stop him.  "I have 
something to do."  He walked out the door replacing the pain with anger in his 
eyes.


-------------------

It was just past dusk when Nick let himself into the Raven.  It was to early for 
the bar to be open to the public.  Jordan silently stocked the shelves when Nick 
entered and nodded in recognition, but neither spoke.  Soft melodic strains of 
the rebec could be heard echoing from the private chambers in the rear of the 
building.  Nick walked on and prepared himself for what was to come.

LaCroix had felt Nicholas' turmoil all day, and knew he would come.   The air 
fairly sizzled with Nick's connection to him when he stepped into the Raven.  
He couldn't help but feel pleasure in knowing Nick had turned to him in his 
hour of despair this time.  What had changed?  Nicholas as a general rule never 
gave into his need of him unless forced.  This was indeed a monumental step 
forward in bringing his troubled son back  into the fold.  He would simply wait 
and see what had caused the problem this time. The good doctor no doubt.
 
Nick stepped through the curtain and silently waited for LaCroix to finish the 
last strains of the melody.  He knew his father was aware of his presence.  The 
question was....did he already know why?

When LaCroix finished, he placed the rebec back into it's case and snapped the 
lid closed.  "Nice of you to join me, Nicholas.  To what do I owe the pleasure of 
your company?"  LaCroix analyzed his son and reached out through their link 
only to be pushed away.  His resistance brought a smile to his lips and piqued 
his curiosity.  The signals he'd been receiving all day were obviously not quite 
as accurate as he'd hoped, yet Nicholas was here.

"Don't do that, LaCroix."  Nick closed the distance between them.  "I don't need 
you inside my head to find out what's going on.   I'm going to tell you."  Nick 
walked around his master and stood by the window and opened the drapes to 
the night sky.  "I'm going to give you what you want.  I'll leave town with you 
and travel as your companion.  I'll come back into the community and live as a 
vampire."  He turned to face his father not bothering to hide the pain or the 
resolve in his face.  It was useless around LaCroix anyway.  "I won't kill for 
you, but, I'll stay by your side for the next decade, no questions asked, if you 
grant me one favor."

Unable to believe his ears or the emotional resolve he felt from his son, 
LaCroix stood momentarily speechless.  His son's blue eyes locked with his and 
waited.  Nick was very good at negotiating.  He knew exactly what he wanted 
and how to strike a bargain, so he waited unmoving until LaCroix made the 
first move.  "It must be something worth sacrificing your soul for then, 
Nicholas.  Since I know how you feel about being around me and most of the 
community.  Pray do tell me what this favor is that is worth so much 
to you."  LaCroix closed the distance between them this time and waited.

"I want you to take away Natalie's memory of our relationship.  I want you to 
make her believe that we were only just friends and it's time for me to move on.  
I want you to make her believe it's what I want and it will make me happy.   Do 
this and I'm yours for the next 10 years.  The Enforcers will lay off and 
everyone will be better off."  Pain was etched in his eyes and he didn't try to 
hide it as he waited for LaCroix's decision.

LaCroix watched Nicholas closely as he spoke and felt the stony resolve that 
Nick was famous for when he'd made up his mind.  Whatever had happened, 
had made him accept reality once more.  He was a vampire.... and she a mortal.  
Their lives were never meant to intertwine without consequences and as a good 
father, he couldn't help but point that out.  "I assure you Nicholas, that you've 
finally made the right decision.  I don't know what has brought about this chain 
of events, but it is the best for everyone.  I agree.  Your precious Dr. Lambert's 
memory for 10 years of your companionship.  The Enforcers will be pleased, as 
am I."  LaCroix turned and went to the small bar at the back of his quarters and 
returned with a bottle of the house special and two glasses.  He poured, then 
offered one to his son.  Nick didn't hesitate but took the glass and downed its 
content in one gulp.  Instant pleasure cascaded through him as he swallowed 
but he fought it.  LaCroix chuckled at his son's response to the blood and 
poured him another.  

Nick stared at the blood in the glass and then brought it to his lips and 
swallowed once more.  It was the right decision.  It was time to move on and 
even if it weren't the Enforcers or LaCroix this time, it would be eventually.  He 
couldn't let Natalie sacrifice her dreams because of him, not now.... nor later.  
He loved her to much for that.  It was time he finally admitted it and moved on.

"Wise decision, Nicholas."  LaCroix stared at his son.  His feelings were so 
transparent, it was almost like reading his mind.  "If you love her, then you 
must let her go.  Isn't that what you told me 800 years ago about Fleur.  You 
will destroy everything that you love with the first taste of her blood.  Her 
beauty, her hopes, her desires, her dreams will all disappear in the instant you 
make her one with you."  LaCroix poured another glass of blood and stared at it 
longingly and let himself drift back to thoughts of Fleur and the pain clutched 
his cold heart and squeezed tightly once more.  His eyes then drifted back to his 
son.  "Welcome to hell, Nicholas.  Welcome to the only place that hurts worse 
than never loving at all."  He downed the blood and tossed the glass in the 
fireplace, then turn to glare at his son with the anger he always felt after 
remembering what he'd lost.  

"I'd always thought it would be proper revenge for me to kill the mortal you fell 
in love with, but this is even better.  You will suffer as I did and watch your 
beloved Natalie fall in love and grow old with another without even 
remembering what you shared.  The pain every time you see her will make you 
ache with such sadness that you'll wish you were dead....and when she dies, a 
part of you will die with her."  LaCroix watched the pain in his son's eyes flare 
even brighter because he truly understood what was to come.  Somehow it 
didn't please him as he thought it would.  Some part of him had hoped for 
something better for his son and it saddened him in a way he didn't think 
possible anymore.  Maybe he wasn't totally devoid of feelings after all.  He 
brushed the thought away like a bothersome insect while he watched Nicholas 
struggle and finally conquer his emotions.  LaCroix had always envied him 
that.  Emotion were such a tedious part of  humanity and Nicholas had never 
seemed to lose his.  Maybe that's what always fascinated him about his son.

Unable to face his father any longer, Nick walked to the fireplace and lost 
himself in the flames.  "I'll need to tie up a few loose ends in order not to draw 
attention to the community.  I have to find the man who did this to Natalie and 
resign my position or it will look strange, and questions will be asked."  Nick 
looked to LaCroix for his approval.

"What makes you so certain it wasn't one of our kind that hurt your precious 
pet?"  LaCroix smirked and then found another glass to drink from.

"No one of our kind would be that sloppy, unless it was you playing mind 
games with me.... and it wasn't you or I would have tasted it in her blood."  He 
waited for his words to sink in and watched the slip of the stoic face before him, 
then Nick smiled.  "She's in the hospital.  I would expect she would be more 
malleable to your persuasion in her current state than when she fully recovers.  
I'll clean up all the lose ends and make sure she's safe.  You hold up your end of 
the bargain, and I'll hold up mine."  Nick tossed his empty glass in the fireplace 
and headed for the door.
  
------------ 

"Here are the books you asked for, Detective Schanke."  Anne Monroe placed 
the mug books quietly on the chair besides Schanke.  "How is Dr. Lambert?"   
Anne watched the still form sleeping on the small bed before her.  

"Doctors say she's going to be fine.  Concussion and little loss of blood, but 
she'll be fine. We are going try and get her to ID the guy.  You get that list I 
requested?"  Schanke looked hopeful as he met the young officers friendly 
smile.

She handed it to him and shook her head in dismay.  "Detective Knight sure 
has put a lot of people behind bars in the past several years.  Looks like one of 
them decided to get even and Dr. Lambert got lucky."  Monroe headed for the 
door.  "Well, I'll pass the good word on at the precinct about the Doc.  Lots of 
people have been worried.  She's a nice lady.  Tell her I stopped by when she 
wakes up."  She waved and popped out the door.

"Schanke?"  Nat whispered through dry lips.  "Where's Nick?"  She searched 
the room wincing in pain as she tried to turn her head.

"Hey, hey!  Don't do that!"   Schanke leaned over the bed and made her look at 
him.   "Nick was here all day.  He said he had to go take care of something and 
he'd be back later tonight.   The docs say you're going to be fine.  Take more 
than a hard knock to the head to put you out of it."  Schanke laughed and 
pulled the covers up around her like a mother hen.

"Thanks, Schank!"  She smiled but her eyes didn't.  He knew she wasn't who 
she wanted by her side.  Damn, Knight!  Why wasn't he here?   "You think 
you'd recognize the guy who did this, Nat?"  Schanke looked hopefully at her.

"I think so, Schank.  It was dark but I got a pretty good look at his face."  She 
struggled to sit up and Schanke helped her.  Once she was propped up, he 
handed her the first mug book.  I've got a list of possible perps that Nick's put 
away over the years.  There's only about 20 of them on the outside and only 5 
still in Toronto.  You feel up to it?"  She nodded and he opened the book.  
"Take a look at number 481197."  She looked and then said no.   "Okay, try  
page 22, number  511122."  Once again, not the man. Schanke reached over 
and handed her another book.  "How about page 5, number 332274?"  Nat 
stared at the picture then brought it closer.  "That's him, Schank!  That's 
the man in Nick's apartment."

Schanke pulled the photo and grabbed his cell phone. "Captain, it's Schanke.  
It's Murphy...Arnold Murphy.  Nick put him away 4 years ago for beating his 
wife to death.  Guess he decided it was revenge time.......No, I don't know 
where Nick is.  He said when he left about an hour ago, he had something to 
do.......No, he looked like hell."  Schanke turned and smiled at Nat.  "Yeah, 
Nat's fine.   A little pale but still rosier than Nick on a good day......Yeah, I'll 
tell her.  Have Nick call me when you hear from him okay."   Schanke flipped 
the phone closed.  "Captain sends her best.  Nick will show up here before 
anywhere else.  I'm sure of it.  Schanke eyed the door with hesitation.  I really 
hate to leave you Nat, but there's a guard outside and one at each entrance.  I 
really need to get Murphy's picture out on the wire.  I don't think he'll come 
after you this time anyway.  I think you were just in the wrong place at the 
wrong time."

"Go, Schank!  I'm fine.  Besides, the sooner you get out of here, the sooner 
Murphy's back behind bars.  Nick will be back soon.  Don't worry."  She smiled 
bravely even though she felt like Jell-O inside.  She was still terrified, but she'd 
not stop Schanke from doing his job.   She was a big girl, but it hurt to think 
she wasn't important enough for Nick to stick around.  Once again, she was 
seeing something she wanted and not reality.  Maybe it was time she accepted 
the fact that Nick didn't feel the same about her as she did about him.  The 
words echoed in her mind even though she tried to stop them.  "I don't love this 
woman, LaCroix.  It's in my best interest to humor her.  After all, she is 
helping me to find a cure."  A single tear escaped her eye and she brushed it 
away in frustration, then the air stilled around her.

"Pity, Doctor, that you waste your tears on something unattainable."  LaCroix 
stepped into the light.


Part 3


 Natalie sat up a little quickly and felt the dizziness wash over her.  She 
grabbed the rail of the bed to steady her before she spoke.  Tired, hurt eyes met 
LaCroix's but she forced the fear behind them because she refused to give into 
this man, no matter how old he was.  "Where's Nick?  Is he alright?"  She knew 
LaCroix would know and she had to know he was alright, even now.

"Nicholas is quite well, Doctor.  He is always quite well in spite of your 
misgivings.  He asked me to stop by and give you this."  He handed her a 
magnificent magenta-colored, perfumed rose with the thorns removed.  The 
soft, gentle scent of the rose wafted through the room with a light odor 
beckoning her to enjoy it fully.  She placed the rose under her nose and inhaled 
deeply.  The sweet scent enveloped her and she began to relax.  He locked onto 
her heart beat.

"Yes, Doctor.  It has such a sweet scent...one of calm, one of peace and that's 
what I'm going to give you."  He pushed the rose back up under her nose.  She 
inhaled once again relaxing further until her body gave into it and she started 
to fall backwards in the bed.  LaCroix caught her and laid her gently back on 
the pillows, then locked his blue eyes to hers as he spoke.

"You will remember only that Nicholas is your friend, Doctor.  You are good 
friends and have been for a long time, but nothing more.  You have told him 
there is no chance of a cure with the current medicine available and he has 
become restless.  He needs to move on to make himself happy.  Moving on is 
the only thing that will make him happy, and you will not stop him because if 
he is happy, you are happy.  He is a vampire that has reached the end of his 
time here . You understand and accept it.  It is time for you to move on with 
your life, to marry, have children and grow old with someone you love.  It is 
best for you both that he leaves.  When he leaves you will tell him, never to 
contact you again.  It is what you want.  You never loved him and he never 
loved you.  You will remember only that you were good friends.  Do you 
understand?"  He waited for her to respond.

"Only friends.....yes, we are friends.  He's told me that.  Time to move 
on....make him happy....."  Her voice echoed and faded, yet tears formed in her 
eyes and began to spill over onto her cheeks.

LaCroix watched in fascination at the young woman before him.  Her doubts 
were the tool allowing him to succeed, and he knew it.  Her love for him was 
stronger than anything he'd encountered.  It was good Nicholas was leaving 
now.  Her will was stronger than any he'd met, except maybe Nicholas'.  
Together they would be unmanageable and that was unacceptable.   "Good, 
Doctor....Remember Valentines Day.  Remember his words, and you will 
always know in your heart what you are to Nicholas.  Sleep now, and 
heal.....your time for love is yet to come."  LaCroix laid the rose gently on her 
chest, then disappeared.

------------- 

He had to know she was alright, if LaCroix's suggestions were working.  Who 
was he kidding?  He needed to be with her, even if it was in friendship.  Soon, 
that wouldn't be an option.  In his mind he knew it was a mistake, but his heart 
just couldn't let go yet, so he slipped quietly into the room.  The rose sat softly 
on her chest rising up and down as she breathed.  He leaned over and gently 
removed it.  As the scent disappeared, she began to wake.  He brushed the stray 
locks off her forehead, knowing touching her wouldn't be an option any longer 
and his fingers ached for the feel of her skin beneath his.  Without thinking he 
leaned over and kissed her lips softly one last time.  She responded with such 
warmth and moaned into his mouth.  How desperately he wanted to hold her in 
his arms.  An ache in his chest painfully increased as she forced her way to full 
consciousness and he made himself unwillingly retreat.  When her eyes opened, 
he stood silently by her bedside warring with the emotions within himself 
knowing what was right, but fighting it.

"Hi!"  Her bright blue eyes smiled at his.  "Don't look so distressed, Nick.  I'm 
fine."  She reached out to grab his hand and squeeze it gently.  "I just can't 
remember a few things, but that's normal....but hey, I'm having some great 
dreams in exchange."  She smiled and tried to sit up.  Nick helped her and 
plumped the pillows up behind her.  "Thanks, Nick.  You're always there when 
I need you."  She stared at him momentarily and fought for a memory that 
whispered at the edges of her mind, then was gone.

"Did Schanke tell you, I picked the guy out.  It was Murphy, the guy you put 
away for beating his wife to death.  I remember her body well."  Nat's head 
suddenly began to throb and she rubbed her temples.  "By the way, why was I at 
the loft?.  Did I have some papers for you or something?  I can't seem to 
remember."  Her eyes questioned his and he could see LaCroix's handiwork.

His heart lurched in his chest to the point of raw pain, but he knew what had to 
be done. She deserved a chance at a real life.  A chance at her dreams.  "Yeah, 
it was some tox reports.  I had to go to the meeting with the Captain, don't you 
remember?  You said you'd drop them off.  I'm really sorry....."  Pain and guilt 
was written on his face.

She touched his arm gently.  "Stop it, Nick.  It wasn't your fault.  I was just in 
the wrong place at the wrong time."  Nick always blamed himself for 
everything.  She didn't want him feeling guilty over this. He had enough guilt 
in his life.  Besides, what are friends for if you can't help when they're down.  
That's why he's here.  Friends, that what they were in spite of all their 
differences, and the fact that he was a vampire, and she was mortal.  She 
liked him.  She just hoped this wasn't the straw that pushed him into the 
decision of moving on just yet, but maybe even that was for the best.  He had 
been so preoccupied lately.  Odd, she could remember that and not going to the 
loft.  "I'll be fine.  Now you and Schanke go out and get that slimeball.  I don't 
want to meet him on the street or anything, and I don't think any other woman 
does either."  She squeezed his arm and he forced a smile.

"Okay, Nat.  You get some rest. I'll talk to you later."  Nick squeezed her hand, 
then turned to leave.  When he shut the door, he leaned against the wall and 
grieved.  Flashes of the blond little boy running in the grass touched his 
memory and he knew he'd made the only decision right for her.


-------------- 
  

2 weeks later:

Nick sat staring at the computer screen searching.  Schanke walked in and 
slammed the report down on the corner of his desk.  "Okay, Nick!  What gives.  
That's the 3rd trip to the morgue this week I've done for you, and you're 
obsessed with Morgan.  Not that I blame you if someone had done that to Myra, 
but you're avoiding Nat."

"Nat and I are just friends, Schank!  She's told you that and so have I.  
Friends....that's all....don't read more into it than is there."  Nick forced his will 
subtly on Schanke as he spoke.  "Ask her, Schank,  she'll tell you....we are just 
friends.  I'm just doing my job.  I'm going to get Morgan off the street and make 
it safer......"

Schanke shook the fog from his head.  "Yeah right, Nick.  I believe the moon is 
made of green cheese, too."  Schanke pushed the papers in Nick's hand.  That's 
the Simmons autopsy.  Death by natural causes according to Natalie, so we can 
put it to bed.


----------

Grace had watched Natalie closely over the past couple of weeks and she was 
really confused.  She knew Nick and Natalie were much closer than friends, 
and the frequent headaches worried her.  Natalie seemed obsessed with work 
since returning, and she kept giving the same response about Nick almost word 
for word for over 2 weeks.  That wasn't even like Nat, and let's not even talk 
about Knight.  He had avoided the morgue like the plague and sent Schanke.  
She was sure  something major had happened between the two of them the 
night of Nat's attack, but neither one of them had ever been very forthright 
about their relationship.  She just knew Nat wasn't happy and the headaches 
were becoming more frequent.  It was almost like her memories were trying to 
fight their way back.  Maybe Nat just needed some good sack time with the 
right man to straighten her out.  She had ideas for the perfect man, but neither 
Nat nor Nick were biting.  She would just have to watch for an opening.  She 
wasn't going to stand by and watch them throw it all away because of some 
insane fanatic.

"Natalie, you need to get some rest.  Why don't you and Nick watch some 
movies or something like you used to...It use to make you both much more 
tolerable."  Grace waited for her to take the bait.
.
"Nick and I are just friends, Grace.   I'm sure he's got someone else to spend his 
free time with.  Not that it wouldn't be a pleasant break, but Nick apparently is 
not interested in me that way.  So I guess I'm just going to have to live with it."  
Nat stared at the journal on her desk, knowing she would have to tell him that 
she'd been wrong about finding a cure.  He would certainly leave then.  She 
knew it as sure as she breathed, and had been avoiding telling him.  Maybe a 
part of her still hoped he'd find some interest in her, but that was obviously not 
happening.  After all they'd been around each other for 4 years.  If Nick had 
any other ideas about her, he would have done something by now.  Even Nick 
isn't that dense about women.  She just wasn't pretty enough for him.  Her 
thoughts drifted to Janette and the way her perfect size 3 fit those expensive 
dresses so nicely.  After 800 years with that, no wonder Nick wasn't interested 
in dowdy Dr. Natalie Lambert.  You'd think she'd have gotten use to it by now.  
She shruggedand pushed the notebook aside and her head began to ache once 
more. 

"Maybe you're right though, Grace, I need to knock off early."  Nat pushed back 
from the desk, flipped on the light and reached for her jacket on the back of her 
chair.  "I'm going to run by the store and get some cat food and call it a night"  
She smiled wearily and headed for the door.

----------


Nick pushed open the lift door and stepped in.  He felt the ever increasing 
loneliness creep over him again.  The thought of never seeing Nat again 
weighed heavy on his heart.  He pitched his jacket on the table and went to the 
fridge.  He grabbed the first bottle he saw and pulled the cork.  Without 
thinking or tasting, he simply drained the bottle and headed toward the blank 
canvas sitting in the corner of the loft.  He hadn't painted in months, until a 
week ago.  As usual, he was drawn to the oils and canvas while his mind 
and heart fought out their battles.  He picked up the paint brush and began to 
paint once more.  It was nearly noon before he finally gave into the fatigue that 
overwhelmed him and stretched out on the couch to sleep. There would be no 
dreams today.

------------
 
Natalie walked out of the grocery and fumbled for her keys beside her car.  The 
bright lights coming around the corner temporarily blinded her and she threw 
her arm  up to protect her against the glare from the headlights.  They got close 
and swerved deliberately at her.  Unable to believe what was happening, she 
dropped her bag. In the time it takes to breathe, she was hit from the side and 
knocked safely to the sidewalk only moments before the car side-swiped her 
parked car.  Had it not been for the interfering body on top of hers, she would 
have been dead.  The screeching of metal against metal could be heard for 
blocks in the early morning hours as the car righted itself in the street, then 
sped away.  Seconds later, she felt her self being jerked to her feet.

Nat dusted herself off in frustration then groaned in pain  when she tried 
moving her shoulder.  This was getting a little much.  First it's Nick's loft.... 
and now, a hit and run.  She was going to have to wear  body armor.  Gratitude 
overwhelmed her, though, as she lifted her head to greet the man who just 
saved her life.

"Are you alright?"  A soft warm voice penetrated her foggy mind when she 
raised her head to meet the greenest eyes she'd ever seen.  Concern was laced in 
the tone of his voice and he reached gently to steady her as she tried to gain her 
balance while rubbing her shoulder.

"I....I'm fine....thanks to you, but I think I might have dislocated my shoulder 
when I hit the sidewalk."  She smiled, yet winced when he touched her arm.  
Her blue eyes locked with possibly the best looking man she'd seen in ten years 
and she almost gasped in surprise.  "Thank....thank you!  You saved my life it 
would appear."  She glanced at the back of her car and the crumpled metal..  "I 
don't think I would have fared any better than my car if you hadn't pushed me 
out of the way."  She offered him her good hand and cradled the other next to 
her body.  "Natalie Lambert, a little worse for wear, but very much alive."  She 
smiled bravely.

"Locke Blackthorn....U.S. citizen, early morning jogger out of habit, at your 
service."  Locke accepted her outstretch hand and shook it gently.  He noticed 
her grimacing with the slight movement.  "I think I'd better get you to a 
hospital to have that shoulder looked at.  I could call an ambulance for you or 
we could take my car down the street at my hotel.  It's parked right up front 
because I was leaving as soon as I showered and changed."  He motioned at the 
jogging clothes he wore and the sneakers.  She smiled at his discomfort and his 
American attitude.  He reminded her of Nick in a lot of ways. Knight in shining 
armor to the rescue.   

"A ride would be much preferred.   I think it just needs put back in place, and 
the ambulance would take a bit longer than the short walk down the street.  
Nice to meet you, Locke Blackthorn....U.S. citizen in jogging attire.  Thanks 
again for saving my hide."  He offered his arm for support and she walked 
slowly by his side down to the car parked in the front of the hotel.  When they 
approached, a bellman ran up, opened the door for her, and handed the keys to 
Locke.  

"I saw the whole thing, Mr. Blackthorn.  Tell the lady I got the license plate 
number when she gets ready to call the police."  Jake smiled broadly and 
accepted the dollars shoved in his hand.  Locke smiled with approval, jumped 
in and headed for the hospital.

---------


Part 4
  
  
Natalie walked slowly out of the Emergency Room door, massaging her 
shoulder as she walked.  It had taken an hour, but her shoulder was back in 
place.  A little stiffer than when she started the evening, but all the parts were 
working again.  She stopped at the admitting desk to sign more papers and saw 
him in the waiting room.  He stood staring out the window almost deathly still, 
so she took the time to analyze him.  He was about 6'2" and 185lbs, dark hair, 
finely toned body, with a chiseled jaw line that bespoke aristocratic blood lines.  
His stance was one of confidence, not arrogance, and an inquisitive mind.  In 
no uncertain terms, he was incredibly good looking and there was something 
about him that attracted her to him naturally.  Almost as if he could feel her 
eyes on his back, he turned. Bright green eyes filled with relief met hers when 
she stepped through the door.  Quickly he assessed her condition, then stepped 
toward her.

"You look a little better than an hour ago."  He smiled and reached for her 
jacket that she carried over her shoulder and offered to help her on with it.

Nat smiled and accepted the help.  Slowly she slipped her sore shoulder into the 
jacket, then her other arm.  He gently lifted it up onto her shoulders.  "Thanks, 
Locke.....and I mean that for more than the coat."  She smiled and looked at 
him skeptically.  "I thought you'd be gone by now, since you were in a big 
enough hurry to have your car already out front."  She waited for him to 
explain.

His charming smile made his eyes twinkle in amusement.  "Well, I couldn't just 
leave you here stranded now could I?  I called the real estate agent and 
rearranged the showings.  I'll make up for it this afternoon.   Can I give you a 
lift home, since your car is in bad shape, or do you need to have it taken care of 
right away.  I'm not familiar with your laws up here, but you really don't look 
like you need to deal with a hit and run right at this moment."

"Well, to be honest, I'm exhausted.  I worked overtime to begin with and with 
these drugs kicking in, I'm probably not going to be much good with the police 
anyway.  I'll just call the precinct and have them take care of it.......and I would 
very much appreciate a  lift home, thanks!"  She smiled bravely only a little 
skeptical because of all her past experience with strange men, but he was so 
darn good looking how could she pass it up.  "Great!"  He offered his arm and 
she gladly accepted.

When they arrived at her apartment, he escorted her to the door.  She wasn't 
quite comfortable with it, but after all he'd just saved her life and drove her 
home.  "Would you like a cup of coffee or something.  I'd offer to cook, but 
most of my groceries are on the sidewalk beside my car."  She smiled 
apologetically.

"No, thanks, Natalie. You really need to get some rest and I've got to go look at 
those properties.  I'm on a tight schedule with the lawyers and the real estate 
people.  If I don't find a location for my publishing house up here before next 
week, the Canadian government will rescind their clearance for the project."  
Locke reached over and unlocked the door for her.  "I will take a rain check 
and claim dinner though.  The nights get pretty lonely when you don't know 
anyone in town.  Can I call you and take the fair maiden out to dinner?"  He 
chuckled then bowed in a knightly manor in front of her.

Natalie laughed.  Of course!  She reached into her coat pocket and pulled out 
one of her cards.  I work mostly nights at the coroner's office.  My number is on 
there and my pager as well.  Give me a call when you get a chance and I'll try 
to take a couple hours off or maybe the whole evening.  It's the least I can do 
for the knight in shining armor who threw himself in harm's way to save me."  
She chuckled again.

"A medical examiner.....I would never have guessed."  He stared at the card in 
his hand.  "Well, you're on, Doctor.  Dinner it will be.....How about Thursday 
night.  I'm through with meetings at 6pm.  I can pick you up at your dinner 
break or if you can get the night off, I'll let you show me the night life here."  
He watched her closely.  She was cautious as she should be, and he really didn't 
expect she would completely trust him.  

"I have to work, but I break at 9 for dinner.  Is that too late for you?"  She 
thought a short meeting would be better for a start.  She didn't want any more 
Roger Jameisons in her life.

"Works great...I'll pick you up at the morgue.....Now that's a line you don't hear 
very often."  He smiled and headed for the stairs.  "Oh, by the way, the bellman 
at my hotel said he got the license plate number of the car.  I'll have him call 
you with it."  Locke waved and headed down the stairs.  "See you Thursday, 
Natalie."  Then he was gone.

Nat watched him disappear and then opened the door.  Maybe her luck had 
changed.  She walked into the room and was greeted by Sidney.  She tossed her 
keys and coat on the table and picked up the phone.  After telling Margaret all 
the details, she thought about dialing Nick, but it was almost noon and she was 
sure he'd be asleep by now.  He wouldn't be able to do anything before tonight 
and the day shift Captain would have an APB out on the driver just as soon as 
they talked to the bellman.  She was going to sleep.  Her body needed rest and 
recuperation badly.

------------


Grace pulled Natalie to her desk as soon as she walked through the door.  
"Okay, girl.  Are you alright?  Schanke just called down here filling me in.  
Nick's been going ballistic since he found out.  He didn't find out till he walked 
in the door tonight.  What's going on with you two?  You didn't tell him some 
creep tried to run you down.  A month ago, he would have been the first person 
you told, and by the way it was a stolen car, and who is this Locke Blackthorn?"  
Grace tapped her foot on the floor as she waited impatiently for Nat to answer.

"I am." Came the soft melodic voice from behind the women.  Locke stepped 
into the room gracefully.  He wore a 2 piece charcoal pin stripped suit with a 
geometric silk tie, very professional and elegant at the same time.  He walked 
into the room in control and not the least bit intimidated by his surroundings.  
His bright green eyes met Grace's and he extended his hand.  "Locke 
Blackthorn at your service, madam."  He smiled as Grace blushed under her 
dark skin.

"I....I....am really sorry, but Natalie here has had a rough time of it lately and 
we're all a little protective of her."  Grace stammered a little as she stared at the 
man before her.

"I found that out, just as soon as I returned to my hotel this afternoon.  I was 
told in no uncertain terms I was to fill out a complete report this evening at 
Metro."  He smiled when his eyes met Nat's.  "Not that I'm complaining.  It 
gave me an excuse to come and check on her anyway."  He walked over to her 
desk.   "I see that you've recovered admirably."  He winked at Nat and chuckled 
as Grace continued to stare at him.

"Apparently, she's still having some memory loss though."  Nick familiar soft 
voice echoed from behind the group as he stood at the door watching the 
proceedings.

Nat jumped slightly in surprise at his voice and a throbbing pain hit her 
suddenly.  She grabbed the corner of the desk with one hand and her head with 
the other.  Nick was at her side instantly as was Locke.   The look of worry in 
Nick's eyes was not lost on Locke as he steadied Nat on one side while Nick 
held the other.  Whoever this blond man was, he was more than a working 
acquaintance.  Just as quickly as the worry crossed Nick's face, he pushed it 
behind his stone mask of indifference.  To the casual observer, it would 
have gone unnoticed, but Locke was not a casual observer. 

"I'm okay, guys....Really!"  Nat blue eyes met Nick's and the sense of loss she 
felt almost overwhelmed her but she just couldn't grasp the memory.  
Exasperated, she pushed away from both of them.  "I'm fine....my car's not, and 
I'm a little stiff, but none the worse for wear."  Nat motioned to Locke standing 
protectively beside her.  "Nick, this is Locke Blackthorn.  He was the gentlemen 
who pushed me out of the way of the car before it side-swiped mine in front of 
the market."  She then motioned to Nick with her head.  "Locke, this is 
detective Nick Knight.....he has a knight in shining armor complex too.  
You both should get along fabulously.  I, however, have work to do.  So if you 
want to get a statement from Locke, Nick, you're going to have to drag him 
next door unless you both want to watch me cut up Mr. Austin over there."   
She motioned to the covered body on the table.

Locke stared at the covered body and chuckled.  "It wasn't on my evening's 
agenda, and I think I can live without it."  His bright green eyes twinkled in the 
low light making him even more attractive.  It was not lost on Nat.  

Nick watch her reaction to the good looking man and recognized the attraction 
immediately.  He should have felt happy, but instead he felt like he'd been hit in 
the gut.  He fought back the urge to pull Natalie away from him and calmly 
walked toward the door.  It's what she needs.....a normal relationship with a 
good man.  Immediately Nick's mind replayed Roger Jameison's image.  He 
shook his head to clear the image.  This is what he wanted for her.  He had to 
let her go, but there was no reason why he shouldn't check this guy out anyway.  
He turned to find Locke only 2 paces behind him when he reached the door.  

Nick smiled effortlessly with his mask in place.  "I suppose since we've been 
thrown out..."  Nick nodded at Nat "....that we should continue your statement 
at the precinct.  You drive or take a cab?"  Nick eyed the man before him 
closely finding him nothing but impeccable.  The kind of man women chased 
hopelessly until they caught them.  He wondered just how attainable the 
mysterious Locke Blackthorn was.

"I drove, Detective. I'll follow you over to the precinct."  They proceeded down 
the hall and out into the lot.  "What kind of car do you drive?"  

Nick motioned to the green 62 Cadillac in front of them.  "You can't miss me.  
I'm a one of a kind in Toronto."  Nick reached for the door.  Locke eyed the car 
closely.

"It was a great car. Largest trunk ever made if my memory serves me correctly.  
My Dad use to own one until someone ripped it off.  You must be a collector."  
Locke questioned the young blond man before him.  How old was Knight?  He 
had the looks of 35 but the eyes of someone much older.  What was it about 
him that caught his attention?  Was it his protective attitude toward Natalie or 
something else?.

Nick watched Locke analyze him.  He was bright, inquisitive and not the 
average mortal.  You could feel the raw power that he kept controlled.  Who 
was this guy?  And was he safe for Natalie to be around? Nick needed answers, 
and the sooner the better.  "Let's get over to the precinct and you can fill me in 
on the hit and run.  I want all the details you can remember and more."  Nick 
waited for Locke to catch the inference which he did instantly.

"Lead the way, Detective."  Locke headed for his rental car parked behind the 
caddie and they headed for the precinct.

---------


"So did Nick grill you for hours yesterday about the hit and run?"  Natalie 
smiled as she picked up her glass of wine off the table.  She hadn't really 
expected him to show up at all after all the time he had to spend at Metro going 
over the details of the other night, let alone take her to someplace so nice on 
such short notice.  Natalie was feeling a tad guilty for not taking the whole 
night off.  After all, the man saved her life and Schanke gave him a clean bill 
of health in the legit department.  Nick hadn't agreed yet, but even he had to 
admit, Locke Blackthorn was exactly what he seemed. 

"Oh, it wasn't that bad.  They were just concerned about you.  Nick told me you 
had been attacked only a couple of weeks ago by some perp who was trying to 
get even with him only because you were dropping off some papers.  They are 
just concerned about your welfare.  Nick especially I think."  Locke picked up 
his glass of wine and watched her intently to ascertain her reaction.

A small wave of pain raced through her head behind her eyes and Natalie 
pushed it away.  "Nick and I have been close friends for almost 4 years.  I've 
been working on his allergy problem.  Everyone else had given it up for a lost 
cause.  I told him I'd give it a crack.  He's a nice guy, but very remote.  He 
doesn't let people in.  He carries a lot of guilt, and regrets many things in his 
life.   I think that's what makes him such a good cop.  He cares.  So many of 
them don't anymore."  She smiled at the thought of Nick and the little boy he 
saved last week from the burning building.

"Seems to me you are more than friends, Natalie."  Locke waited for verbal 
confirmation of what he already knew.

"No, Locke.  We are just friends.  That's all it ever can be between us.  I wanted 
more but it was one sided.  I'm not Nick's type.  So we are just good friends.  I 
know everyone else seems to think differently, but we are truly....just good 
friends."  Sadness washed over her face briefly and she pushed it away.  The 
pain she'd felt earlier seemed to have disappeared and she wasn't going to 
throw away a perfectly good evening with a handsome man.  "Tell me about 
you, Locke."  She watched him closely and then chuckled.  He was not only 
handsome but modest as well.  What an unusual combination.

"Not much to tell.  I own a paper in Los Angeles and have since I was very 
young.  I took a failing weekly and turned it into a thriving daily and 
publishing company.  I am 38, widowed and a workaholic.  My wife died 2 
years ago after a car crash, and I've been alone ever since.  I'm up here looking 
for a good location to open a branch to the publishing house.  Canada gave me 
3 months to get it all set up and they would approve or disapprove according to 
the financials and tax base.  That's about it."  He smiled and watched her sip 
her wine. She was incredibly pretty and didn't even know it.  Knight must 
be blind.

The rest of the evening was spent in pleasant conversation and laughter.  At 
almost midnight, Nat realized she'd been gone 3 hours and needed to get back 
to work.  

---------

1 week later:

Nick sat at his desk filling out the last set of paperwork on the Trowne murder.  
Wife couldn't handle the beatings any more and resorted to her only defense, a 
38 special.  Nick shook his head is disgust.  Why didn't she just walk away?  A 
part of him understood because he felt the need and frustration within himself 
to the point of violence many times.  This week had not gone well, and the 
rumors were starting to fly big time about Natalie and her new love interest.  
He'd received several comments on being beaten out, but he let them pass.  It 
was becoming more and more difficult to avoid the morgue and he knew it was 
obvious.  Schanke was almost sympathetic, then would revert to anger at Nick's 
lack of interest in beating out his competition.  Each day he returned home to 
paint until he collapsed in exhaustion.  It was his only escape.  It was the right 
thing.  He kept repeating it to himself every time he headed for the Coroner's 
Office.  He had to stay away and give Nat a chance at the life she deserved.  
He'd spent several days researching Locke Blackthorn and could find nothing 
that said he wasn't exactly what he proclaimed to be, a wealthy, widowed 
publisher in town looking for a location for his publishing company to expand 
into the Canadian market.  He was legit and from what 
he'd heard, he was very interested in Natalie.

Nick had watched the glow return to Nat's cheeks when she entered the 
precinct.  It used to be for him, but no longer.  She was vibrant, alive and 
falling in love.  It was obvious to everyone and it ate at what was left of his 
soul.  LaCroix had made her forget, but his heart still ached with a pain that 
never seem to go away.  Was this what LaCroix felt when he left Fleur?  He 
couldn't imagine this pain for 100 years let alone 800.  He would rather be dead 
or in hell.  It couldn't be worse than this.  Each day seem to be harder than 
the next, and Nick knew he had to leave soon or die.  He couldn't watch the 
woman who'd taught him to feel and truly love again fall into bed with another 
man.  He wasn't that strong.  They were close to capturing Morgan.  They'd 
missed him by 30 minutes yesterday at the bar on 4th.  They'd found out were 
he was hiding and staked it out.  He would return and then they'd have him.  
Then he would leave and let Natalie get on with 
her life.

"Okay, Nick, that's it."  Schanke tossed the report on his desk.   "The Captain 
wants the tox reports and your insight on the autopsy.  That means....you go to 
the morgue."  Schanke smiled knowingly.  "An it's about time I might add.  I 
can't believe you're letting the American sweep her off her feet without a fight.  
I know he's rich and good looking, but the last time I checked the women 
around you always seem to do a double take."  Schanke grabbed his coat as 
Nick stared at him.

"Schank, I have to finish this report.  You're going to have....."

"Don't even think it, Knight!  I'm out of here.  The Captain wants your 
input....not mine and besides Jenny's got the day off school and I promised her 
the whole day."  Schanke headed for the door.  "See ya, partner....and tell Nat I 
said hello."  He smiled and headed for the door.

-------

Nick walked slowly down the hall listening to the familiar heart beat of Nat's 
behind the door.  He hadn't realized just how much he missed that until now.   
Just knowing she was near by and she trusted him enough to be close without 
backing away gave him incredible peace.  He heard the other heartbeat and 
knew she wasn't alone.  Grace must have been working late as well.  He pushed 
open the door to see Natalie wrap her arms around Locke's neck and kiss him 
gently on the lips.  His arms surrounded her and pulled her gently into his 
embrace, as he deepened the kiss.  A slight moan escaped her lips as his 
tongue touched hers and they dueled in a mating dance meant for lovers.  Her 
body fit perfectly to his and he let his hands have free roam of her back, then 
pulled her tight against him letting himself go to the feel of her body next to 
his.

Pain ripped through Nick causing him to stop in mid-stride.  The ache he'd felt 
all week exploded into sheer agony as he watched the only woman he truly 
loved in 800 years give herself to another man.  He wanted to scream in 
frustration, then anger, but the stake in his heart kept him from even breathing.  
Nothing he'd ever experienced before prepared him for this kind of betrayal or 
pain, but it wasn't betrayal.  She had never been his.  He'd made certain of that, 
hadn't he?  Every time they'd gotten close, he'd backed away until Natalie's 
need for him to love her was causing her pain.  He'd chosen to make her forget.  
To give her back her life, her dreams, a reality that she could be happy with.  If 
he truly loved her, he had to walk away.  Out of her life forever.  The darkness 
in his soul would eventually overcome them both and he'd kill her.  He knew 
that as sure as he drank blood, as sure as he could fly.  So the pain had to be his 
alone, if she were to survive.  He stepped back out of the door without a sound 
and leaned against the wall in despair.  He had to get out of here.  He had to 
find Morgan.  Running his hand through his hair in frustration, he put the 
infamous mask of control back in place and disappeared into the night.


----------------

The following night:

Schanke jumped into the caddy as soon as Nick stopped.  "No time, Nick.  They 
think they have Morgan at his place.  They called it in just a minute ago.  They 
are just watching till we get there, so step on it."

Nick floored the caddy without a word and they sped toward Morgan's less than 
perfect flat.  Within 5 minutes they pulled up beside the unmarked car.  The 
black and white's sat down the block with their lights off.  The lights in the 3rd 
story window glowed brightly and a shadow periodically walked in front of the 
window.  Nick's anger was almost palatable as he eyed the shadow and reached 
out with his senses.  The man was not in the least bit nervous.  His heart beat 
was slow and regular.  Either Morgan felt completely safe or they had they 
wrong man.  Within a minute Nick was at the base of the stairwell with 
Schanke right behind him.  

"Okay, Nick.  We do this by the book.  We don't want this guy walking on a 
technicality."  Schanke eyed Nick closely hoping his partner had more control 
than he did.

"This guy isn't going anywhere...and he's definitely not walking."  Nick's voice 
was grated with controlled anger and left no room for doubt.  He started up the 
stairwell without another word.

"I hate it when you're like this, Nick.   Nick......"  Schanke whispered as his 
partner disappeared up three flights of steps without breaking a sweat.  Schanke 
hauled himself up the last flight.  "I gotta start working out again."  He scanned 
the top of the stairwell to find Nick plastered against the wall.

"Police, Morgan!  Open up!"  Nick shouted through the door.  Loud scrapping 
sounds beyond the door could be heard quite clearly and then breaking glass.  
Nick smashed the door with his foot and rolled into the room.  A bulky figure 
was trying to wedge itself through the broken window only to discover there 
was no ledge.  "Freeze!"  Nick yelled and the man froze in place, then put his 
hands over his head.

"I'm....I'm not moving, Officer."  Terror was written on his face as the man 
stood perfectly still.  He didn't want the cop losing it and shooting him.  After 
all, it was only a little marijuana.  Ted Morris decided discretion was a whole 
lot smarter than trying to escape.  He should have known free room and board 
was to good to be true.

Nick rose slowly off the floor from his crouched position and switched on 
another light.  "Who are you?"  His tone left no room for lying and Ted was not 
a stupid man.  The blond cop before him was angry and he could have sworn 
his eyes glowed when he rolled into the room.

"Ted....Ted Morris.  This guy that works with my brother gave me his key.  
I....I didn't do anything."  Nick holstered his gun and walked toward the door.  
Schanke stood completely baffled as Nick pushed by him.

"Nick!"  Schanke screamed at his partner as he headed down the stairs.  When 
he reached the ground floor he ran after Nick.

Nick almost pulled the caddy door off its hinges before he climbed in.  "Damn 
it!"  Nick slammed his fist on the steering wheel.  "I thought we had him!"  
Schanke slipped inside the passenger seat and shut the door.

"We'll get him, Nick.  It's just a matter of time.  He hasn't gone after Nat or 
anyone else.  He's laying low until the heat lets up.  He's not completely stupid."  
Schanke had seen Nick pissed before and to be honest it scared the hell out of 
him.  He didn't want to be in Morgan's shoes when Nick caught him, but there 
was more to this than Morgan, and Schanke knew it.  The question was did 
Nick know it?

"Nick, everything will work itself out.  You just need to get this problem with 
Nat straightened out.  You're out of control man.  This is not healthy, and your 
letting this Locke character make headway he shouldn't.    He is....."

"Stay out of it, Schank.  What's between Nat and I is over."  Nick's cold mask 
slipped slightly and Schank could read the regret along with the pain in his 
partner's face.  "I'm putting Morgan away and then I'm out of here, Schank.  It's 
time for me to move on.  I've been here to long."  Nick stared out the window 
and let the memories in Nat's blood wash over him one more time.  They would 
be etched in his heart forever and the only thing he'd be able to take with him.  
It was a sweet pain that grew into an ache of unfulfilled desires and needs that 
could never be quenched.

"Right, you're just going to pack it up and leave.  You're going to walk away 
and let Nat run off with this guy because he's safer for her.  That's it.....isn't it?  
She got hurt because she's close to you and it's all your fault!  So you're going to 
protect her and leave.  Well Nick, who's going to protect her next time?  There 
are no guarantee's in this lifetime, bucko, and just because this guy isn't a cop 
doesn't mean he doesn't have enemies."  Schanke had no idea of any of this was 
getting through, so he just kept talking.

"Stay out of it, Schank.  You don't know the whole story.  Locke's exactly what 
Natalie needs and I'm not going to stand in her way.  I care to much for her."  
His words were almost a whisper and Schanke couldn't believe his ears.

Did Nick just admit out loud his feeling for Natalie?  Will wonders never cease.  
There might be hope for them yet.  Maybe if he pushed him a little harder.  
"Maybe you're right, Nick.  Locke is better for Natalie than you.  He's much 
safer....."

"Drop it, Schanke."  Raw pain was visible in Nick's blue eyes and something 
else.  "This is the end of this discussion."  Nick turned back to the road and 
started the caddy.  The silence between them only made Schanke more 
determined.

--------------  

"Well? "  Captain Cohen questioned as soon as they hit the squad room.

"It wasn't Morgan, Captain.  Just some guy he'd slipped the key to.  He knows 
we're watching.  It's just a matter of time."  Schanke tried to be optimistic, but 
watched the doubtful look he received from the Captain.  Nick had already 
disappeared to his computer to punch up a few numbers.  Schanke turned a 
concerned look at his partner.

Cohen grabbed Schanke's arm before he moved.  "Let him work it out, Don.  
He has reasons for catching this guy far stronger than ours.  Let him use the 
adrenaline to everyone's favor."  She waited for Schanke to understand.  
Finally, he nodded his head in agreement.

The Captain walked back into her office.  There was no better time than the 
present to get some needed answers.  Without a word, Schanke grabbed his coat 
and headed for the morgue.

-------

"Okay, Natalie!  I have had it with this crap between you and Nick."  Schanke 
burst into the morgue at full speed.  He was getting to the bottom of this one 
way or another.  He wasn't losing the best partner he'd ever had because they 
were to hard headed to admit what they felt for each other.

Nat had sat rubbing her temples for the last 20 minutes ever since she'd picked 
up Nick's lab book and her notes.  She hadn't even told him yet, but she knew 
he'd been avoiding her because of her new relationship with Locke.  At times it 
really irritated her that he wouldn't even fight for their friendship, and other 
times she was greatly relieved.  It would have made things much harder if he'd 
been around.  All those little nagging feelings she carried around for Nick 
would get in her way, and Nick had no romantic intentions.  He'd made that 
perfectly clear over the past couple of years.  They were friends and that's all it 
could be. So why was she so frightened of telling him she couldn't find a cure?  
She already knew the answer.  He would leave and she'd never see him again, 
and that thought hurt.  It hurt more than she was willing to admit, until now.  
A sharp pain hit between her eyes and she gasped with the intensity as Schanke 
finished his tirade.

"Schanke, stop yelling.  My head hurts bad enough as it is.....and I don't know 
what you're talking about.  There is nothing between Nick and I.  We are 
friends.....that's all.  Just the way Nick wants it."  Sad blue eyes met Schanke's 
and their was more than physical pain behind them.

"I'm not listening to that anymore.  Everyone in the department knows you and 
Nick are a whole hell of lot closer than....just friends.  I also know the only 
reason he's staying away from you is because he blames himself for you getting 
hurt."  Schanke paced the floor in front of her animated with his actions as he 
spoke.  "He thinks Locke is safer and will make you happy."  He stopped and 
placed his palms on her desk and locked eyes with hers.  "He's leaving as soon 
as we capture Morgan.  He's throwing his whole career away and leaving for 
your happiness.   Tell me again that you're...just friends.  I know Nick comes 
across like he's made of stone, Nat, but he's hurting and it isn't because he's just 
your friend."  Schanke stood and walked toward the door.

"Schank?"  Nat's voice was a mere whisper in the cold room.  "Why won't he 
......."  Bright lights flashed in her eyes and the pain she experienced earlier 
returned causing her to gasp for breath.  It intensified to the point she thought 
she'd scream.  She tried to stand and the light increased into flashes becoming 
images and she collapsed.   Schanke caught her before she hit the floor.  
"NOOOOOO!!!!!!"  She grabbed her head and held it tightly as the images 
flashed rapidly into her brain...Nick and her and the Christmas party, the 
picnic,  the popcorn fights as they watched movies, Nick holding her when 
Roger Jamison attacked her, pulling her free from the burning wrecked car, and 
Valentines Day.  That night with his lips on hers, the words of love he spoke to 
her only to take them back that night at the Azure all flashed rapidly in her 
mind..  He was protecting her once more against LaCroix, against the 
Enforcers, against the community and himself.  Words he whispered in the 
hospital and his lips on hers only to back away and deny what he felt in order to 
keep her safe.  They flashed over and over in her mind until she blacked out in 
confusion.

"Nat!  Nat!  Come on, don't do this to me."  Schanke held her as she struggled 
and finally relaxed into the oblivion of darkness.  He reached for the phone and 
it dropped on the floor beside him, then she began to stir once more.  He dialed 
911 and as he started to speak, she awoke.

"I'm....I'm okay, Schank.  I don't need an ambulance....just rest."  Her bright 
blue eyes searched his for understanding.  "I just need to work some things out.  
My memory is starting to come back, but it's all jumbled up and confusing."  
She rose and reached for the corner of the desk to help her gain her balance. 
"Really, I'm okay.  I'm just going to go home and sleep it off. I'll be fine."

Schanke hung up the phone reluctantly.  "Nat, I don't think you should go 
home alone.  You blacked out."

"I'm fine, Schanke."  She smiled and placed a calm steady hand on his 
shoulder.  "I just need some rest."  She started pushing him toward the door.  
"Thanks, Schank!.  I just need to get what's real and what's fantasy in order in 
my head, then I'll be fine."  Schanke was at the door before he realized, and she 
opened it for him.  "Trust me, Schank.  I'd never do anything to hurt Nick.  
He's my best friend and always will be not matter what else happens."  She 
smiled but the fatigue was present even in her eyes.  

"You and Nick are the closest I 've gotten to anyone, Nat.  I don't want to see 
either one of you get hurt, and I don't want to lose my partner."  He smiled 
sheepishly.  "Kinda of selfish I know, but...."

"Go home Schank!  We'll all be fine."  She shut the door then leaned against it 
with her own doubts cascading through her to the point of chaos.  She had to 
make some sense of what she felt....what she saw in the images and only one 
person could answer her questions.  She walked over to her desk, picked up her 
notebook, keys and then her coat.  She would have answers tonight.... one way 
or another.

--------

Nick flipped the cover over the painting and tossed his brush into the paint 
thinner.  A great sadness washed over him as he thought how similar the last 
brush strokes were to the beginning of his relationship with Nat.  He'd thought 
the painting would help him accept what he knew was right, but instead it only 
made the pain worse as the painting itself took on a life of its own.  When he'd 
finished, the emptiness he'd hoped to banish was only made larger and the ache 
in his heart was now his constant companion.  He heard the lift kick on and felt 
Nat's familiar heartbeat caress his very soul and he gave into it.  It would be so 
easy to make her one with him.  Bring her into the darkness with him where 
they could truly be together, then the child danced in his mind and he knew it 
was not an option.

It was almost noon when she stood in front of the security panel and punched in 
the numbers to give her access to the loft.  She stood mesmerized as her fingers 
automatically pressed the right sequence and the garage door slid open quietly 
revealing the green cadillac sitting peacefully in the dark confines of the 
garage.  She walked over to the lift and entered yet another set of numbers and 
the lift released.  What was happening?  How did she know all this?   More 
images flashed through her mind as she road upwards to the loft and she 
pushed open the door to a room so familiar that she almost staggered with the 
vivid recollections that flooded her mind.  Pain once more shot through her and 
she screamed in torment.

"Stop!  Make them stop, Nick! I don't understand....tell me."  She sank to the 
floor on her knees and he was beside her instantly.  He pulled her into his arms 
and caressed her hair as he spoke.

"They're only dreams, Nat.  Don't fight them.  Let them go back to the place 
where dreams belong.  Back to the place in your heart were all the pain is 
gone."  His voice was so soft and mellow it lulled her into a peace she hadn't 
felt in what seemed like an eternity.

"Dreams....just dreams, Nick.  They are so clear, so bright.......I don't 
understand."  Tears flooded her eyes and slipped silently down her cheeks.  He 
brushed them away and locked on to her heartbeat.  

"Dreams, Nat.  That's all they ever were.  That's all they ever can be."  He 
forced her eyes to his and he made them glow with their inhuman light of the 
darkness.  "This is reality... and it scares you.  This is my reality and I have to 
live with it.....not you."  She gasped, but didn't pull away.  Without thinking 
she reached for his face and caressed him.  The blue-gray returned to his eyes 
as well as his own pain.  He pulled away from her and stood.

"No, Nick.  That's only part of what you are. A part you can control."  Her 
voice was a mere whisper as she watched him withdraw.

Silently he walked to the fireplace and stared into the dying embers.  "Go 
home, Nat.  Live that dream you have about a family and a home with children.  
This is your time, your place, your future."  He turned to face her one more 
time.  "Make yourself happy, Nat.....for both you and me."

She felt his resolve and the peace she'd felt earlier returned.  It would make him 
happy.  It was time to move on with their lives.  "You won't leave without 
saying good-bye?"  She couldn't bear the thought of finding the loft empty 
without him saying good-bye....without ever seeing him again.

"I'll always be close, Natalie.  If you need me, I will be there.  Go home now, 
and get some rest.  Live your dreams for both of us."  With a sadness in his 
eyes, he finally pushed the stone mask of indifference in place and disappeared 
right before her eyes.

She stared at the empty space, then gazed up the stairs to find him standing at 
the top of the stairwell.  This was good-bye and they both knew it.  She turned 
and walked out the door.  Her steps echoed in the stairwell and Nick listened to 
them for the final time.


Part 6


-----------

"Nick, they spotted Morgan over on Lisle and 20th.  Black and white wants to 
know what you want done."  Carlisle handed the note to Nick as he spoke.

"Meet me there, Schank!"  Nick jumped out of the chair and ran for the door.

"Nick!  How the....."  Nick had already disappeared through the door before he 
finished.  "....are you going to get there......That's okay, Schanke, you figure 
that one out."  Schanke mumbled to himself as he grabbed his coat.  I will 
never figure that guy out and how he does that.

------------


Nick was not going to lose him this time.  He dropped out of the sky just behind 
the black and white and ran to the door. "Where?"

"He just walked into that restaurant over there.  I think he's in the back booth 
from the way it looks through the binoculars.  We were afraid to go look and 
spook him."  The young officer looked for reinforcement of his actions.

"You did the right thing."  Nick smiled and trotted for the entrance to the dimly 
lit restaurant.  Using he vampire vision he scanned the room from around the 
corner and spotted Morgan eating eggs and bacon in the back corner by the rear 
door.  Nick quickly stepped out and went around to the back.  

Morgan felt uneasy.  As if he was being watched.  He quickly gobbled the last 
bite of his food and threw his money on the table.  When he rose, a nine 
millimeter greeted him.  It wasn't necessary for him to hear the bullet 
chambered for him to know it was loaded.

"Going somewhere, Morgan?"  Nick grabbed his shoulder and shoved the gun 
into his chest pushing him back further into the booth.  Banked anger radiated 
through him and Nick was sure gold flecked his eyes....but he didn't care.  
Morgan twitched and pulled away plastering himself up against the wall in the 
back of the booth.  Nick advanced further and shoved the gun up under his chin 
when he growled out the words.  "Give me a reason, and I'll save the crown a 
little money."    The thought of this man's hands on Natalie enraged him and he 
fought for control.  Terror was written on Morgan's face as he swallowed 
loudly.

Schanke burst through the door to watch Nick press Morgan flat against the 
wall.  "Nick!  Nick!!!"  He grabbed Nick's arm and tried to pull him off only to 
have it pushed away.

"He's mine, Schank!  He's not walking away this time.....not this time."  Nick 
was on the edge and everyone in the room knew it.

"Nick, listen to me.  He's not worth it.  He's dirt.  Don't throw your career away 
on this piece of filth.  It not what Nat would want.  Don't do this."  Schanke 
tried again to pull Nick away.

He wanted to rip his throat out and drain him right there.  He wanted to make 
sure he never hurt another woman.....that he would never touch Natalie or 
frighten her again.  The desire to kill him swept over him, then her voice 
echoed in his mind.  "No, Nick.  It's only part of what you are.....a part that you 
can control."  She wouldn't want him to kill this man for her, and he wouldn't 
let the beast within him have control....not this time.   He stepped back and 
pulled Morgan with him.  "Take him, Schank!  Get him out of my site before I 
kill him."  Nick shoved Morgan into Schanke's grasp and headed for the door.

Schanke quickly cuffed him and smiled.  "You're a lucky man, Morgan.  If I'd 
been a little later, we wouldn't be having this conversation."  Schanke pushed 
him toward the door.

--------------

Nick sat quietly at his desk filling out the last of the paperwork.  Morgan was 
behind bars and he hadn't killed him for revenge.  He'd beaten his beast one 
more time.  Now it was time to move on.  Time to let the others around him 
live normal lives, and Natalie have the peace and love she deserved.  He 
already missed her and Schanke.  He looked around the squad room for the last 
time.  These had been the happiest days of his life in 800 years.  The fact that 
these people trusted him and depended on him made him feel a warmth he'd 
never experienced before...not even when he was human.  He'd written his 
resignation over two weeks ago.  He wanted to make it out before Schanke and 
the Captain got back from the interrogation.  Morgan would be behind bars for 
40 years now, or longer.  Natalie would see to that along with Schank.  He 
quickly signed the last of the paperwork and his resignation and headed for the 
Captain's office.  He dropped his badge and gun on the top of his resignation 
and smiled.  At least Schank wouldn't have to do the paperwork.  He would be 
thrilled with that.  He took one last look at the busy office around him and 
pushed out of the Captain's office and into the squad room.  With one stop, he 
grabbed his coat, tossed a key onto his desk,  picked up the one picture of Nat 
and himself at the Christmas party he'd kept in his desk drawer, then headed 
for the door.

He crawled behind the wheel to the caddy and sat staring at the precinct, then 
the car before him.  He'd had it a long time.  Maybe it was time that he let go of 
it as well.  He started the engine and headed for the loft.  Images of Nat danced 
through his mind as he drove, and after 6 blocks he finally turned the car 
toward her apartment.  He wouldn't leave without saying good-bye.  He owed 
her that and his heart wouldn't let him.  It was probably a mistake, but he 
couldn't live with himself if he didn't.  Good-byes were never his strong point, 
but he'd hurt her so much when he talked about leaving before that he couldn't 
do it again.  As he drove, a part of him knew it was because he had to see her 
one more time.

------------

"You're a wonderful cook, Natalie."  Locke pulled out her chair and offered her 
his hand.  She smiled and accepted it with one hand and grabbed her wine 
glass with the other.  They walked arm and arm to the couch and sat down in 
companionable silence and sipped their wine.

"I guess you're heading back to LA pretty soon, then?"  She hesitated and knew 
she had to have an answer.  He'd found the perfect location.

He smiled and watched her intently.  "It just for awhile.  I'll be up here quite a 
bit getting the place all up and running, and then you can always come see me 
in the States."  He waited to see her reaction.  She was so beautiful and the 
attraction between them had grown steadily over the past several weeks, but 
something held her back.  All he knew was that he wanted her.  She was the 
first woman he'd been really attracted to since his wife's death.  She was the 
perfect counterpart to his personality and they were compatible.  He wanted her 
more than he was willing to admit.

She smiled and reached for his face to caress it lightly with her fingertips.  He 
was so handsome, and perfect in every way.  She could fall in love with him, 
given time.  He was everything she could possibly want, and she had to know if 
they were compatible in every way.  He stopped her hands and kissed the 
fingers one by one, then pulled her into his arms.  His lips sought hers and the 
soft velvety feel of her tongue as it touched his made him want her all the more.  
He deepened the kiss and let himself go to the feel of the inside of her mouth as 
she willingly gave into him.

His warmth spread through her and she wanted more.  She wanted to touch the 
man.  Too feel his hard body against her naked skin, to learn all that there was 
about him.  She pulled his tie from his neck and unbuttoned his shirt.  Her 
fingers had a mind of their own as they splayed freely across his well muscled 
chest and he moaned with desire and need as their tongues dueled.  Without 
thinking he stood them up and let his fingers unzip her dress from behind all 
the time kissing her lips.  As he pulled it free from her shoulder he let his lips 
trail down her neck.   This time she gasped as his lips touched the top of her
breast and nuzzled her through the sheer lace bra that she wore.  He released 
her and pulled her dress completely over her hips and let it float delicately to 
the floor in a puddle at her feet  His lips came back to hers as he pressed her 
near naked body into his hard chest and lifted her out of the dress.  He wanted 
her badly and apparently so did she.  The flames between them exploded and he 
carried her to the bedroom.

-------

Nick noticed Locke's rental car parked at the curb and had second thoughts.  A 
quick movement in the window on the 2nd floor caught his attention and he 
realized the shades weren't drawn.  He picked up Nalatie's accelerated heart 
beat instantly and was drawn to it like a moth to a flame.  With his enhanced 
vision he watched the woman he loved give herself to this man.  When his lips 
touched hers and she moaned with desire, his heart broke into a thousand 
pieces.  Pain tore through him as he watched him remove her dress and press 
his body into hers.  Willingly she gave into him and Nick could feel the lust 
and desire between them even from where he was.  He dropped to his knees in 
despair, but could not tear his eyes away as the one thing he so desperately 
wanted to give her was taken by another. Sharp searing pain filled him with 
despair and he wept openly as the ache in his heart engrained itself in his soul.  
In frustration he took to the sky.

------------

Nick stood before the painting in his loft and signed it.  He stared longingly at 
it as the blood tears continued to flow freely down his cheeks.  Finally, he 
covered it and pinned a note addressed to Nat on the front.  It was over.  It's 
what he'd wanted, and she would be happy.  He could feel it.  Locke would not 
hurt her and she could have everything she deserved.  All the things he couldn't 
give her. That would have to be enough for him.  It was all he deserved.  He'd 
made his choice a long time ago just as he had tonight.  One more song on the 
Steinway and it would be finished.

-----------

He laid her softly on the bed then followed with his body on top of hers.  His 
need had grown to something close to pain as he rubbed himself against her 
naked thigh through his trousers.  He wanted to feel her skin next to his.  He 
wanted her naked beneath him writhing in desire but her body responded to his 
touch out of physical need and nothing more.  Her heart was elsewhere and no 
matter how much he wanted to believe it was him she craved, his instincts told 
him otherwise.  Did he want her bad enough to be the replacement or would 
this only hurt them both?  He'd been through the loss and ache of losing the 
person you love, could he do it again or could he watch her do it to herself?  
Her soft lips beckoned to him and she sought the passion and love she so 
deserved....only it wasn't from him. 

She wanted him.  She wanted to feel him inside her, feel the passion and love 
that he felt for her and she reached out for more.  Her body responded to every 
touch, every kiss like they were meant for each other and she wanted to be one 
with him.  Each kiss made her want more, each touch cried out with passion 
and desire and she wanted him beyond all rational thought.  His blue eyes 
beckoned to her and she wanted to feel his silky blond hair under her fingertips.  
More, she wanted more and it didn't matter the cost, because her heart belonged 
to only him and had for some time.  She moaned in need as he laid on top of 
her and made her wet with desire.  They had come to far, to long, to walk away 
from it now and her body and mind knew it.  "Make me one with you.  Love 
me!"  She whispered softly causing him to almost lose control.

"Natalie?"  Locke forced her to look at him and caught his breath.  He must be 
insane.  Why couldn't he take her?  He knew the answer even as he let the 
thought cross his mind.  "Tell me who I am, Natalie.  Tell me that you want 
ME to love you, not Nick!"  He waited for her to get control and slow her 
breathing.  The glazed look of lust was replaced with shock, when her blue eyes 
met his green ones.

"Locke?"  She looked at him realizing what she'd almost done.  Pain swept 
through her as the bright lights and images flashed endlessly in her mind.  It 
was Nick she'd been making love to, not Locke.  It was Nick who possessed her 
heart and soul and no matter how hard she tried to push it away....it was her 
reality.  Tears flooded her eyes and he pulled her safely into his arms and let 
her weep.  

A part of him understood her grief because he knew as long as things weren't 
settled between her and Nick, they didn't have a chance.  He cradled her in his 
arms as they lay on the bed, and she sobbed uncontrollably.  He simply let her 
cry.  It was the only thing that could heal the wounds.  "It's okay, Natalie.  I 
understand more than you know, but this is different.  Nick isn't dead.  
Whatever the problems are, straighten them out.  Don't give up on what you 
really want and settle for second best."

She sat up slowly and wiped the tears away.  "I'm sorry, Locke. I....just....Nick 
and I....just have had so many obstacles.....and he doesn't feel the same way 
about me as I do about him."  A great sadness was written in her eyes.

"Where did you get that silly idea?"  He brushed another tear from her face.  
"The man I met loves you enough to let you go.  The man I met was willing to 
let you chose what you wanted to make you happy, to keep you safe.  If that's 
not love, I don't know what is!  Whatever the problems are, Nat....rest assured 
the man loves you.  Everyone at the precinct knows that, and I think down deep 
inside you do too.  You are comparing yourself to something in your mind that 
you think Nick wants.  You are what he wants and that's obvious to anyone who 
has seen you two together."  Locke sat her up and wiped the final tears off her 
cheek, then kissed her gently.  "I envy him.  True love comes only once in a 
lifetime.  Don't throw it away, Nat."  He stood up and offered her his hand.  
"Come on.  I think you have someone you need to talk to tonight, and I have a 
flight to catch.."

------------------

Nat stepped out of her apartment and headed for her car.  Nick's green caddy 
sat at the curb with the keys in the ignition.  She headed for the car and pulled 
the keys.  For some reason she looked up to her window and noticed the light 
she'd left on and the open shades.  "Oh, Nick.  What have I done? Forgive 
me.....please forgive me."  Images flashed through her mind of Nick and 
herself, LaCroix at the hospital.  The words he'd implanted in her memory to 
make her forget.  Her doubts as to Nick's love for her and how LaCroix had 
used them.  He was letting her go to make her happy, to protect her and let her 
live out her dreams.  She looked back at the window and remembered Locke's 
lips on hers and how much and how quickly she'd transposed him into Nick.  
"You're my dream, Nick.  Couldn't you see that in my blood?"  She gasped at 
the thoughts that must be going through his mind, if he'd watched her and 
Locke.  The thoughts she'd always had when she saw him and Janette together.  
She smashed his keys into her hands causing them to cut the skin, then headed 
for the car.

--------

Natalie pushed open the lift door and walked into the deserted loft.  
"NOOOOO!!!!!  Nick?"  She called desperately knowing full well he was gone.  
The cold emptiness seeped into her skin and she felt bereft without direction.  
He'd come to say good-bye and seen her with Locke.  He'd kept his promise and 
she'd thrown it all away.  Lovingly she touched the piano, then sat down in his 
favorite chair.  His sword was still there as well as Joan's cross, but Nick was 
gone.  Fear crept into her soul and she finally noticed the painting tarped over 
in the corner of the room with the note.  She tore it open without hesitation.

Nat:

The only thing I could give you was a dream and not reality.  You deserved 
more and I wanted you to have that house and beautiful child you've always 
wanted.  You have a chance at that now, don't ever throw it away.  Love is a 
rare gift found only by a treasured few.  Locke can love you and maybe already 
does.  He  can make your dreams into reality.  I give you the only dream you 
and I could ever share.  The way I have always seen you in my heart.  Be happy 
for both of us.

Love Forever,

Nick

She pulled the tarp free from the canvas.  It was a portrait of her lying nude on 
Nick's  black satin sheets.   The black satin top sheet touched her skin lightly in 
certain areas like the fingers of a lover accentuating  the most sensual areas of 
her body.  The warmth in her eyes spoke of undying love for eternity graced 
with a smile filled with hope and trust.   

The sun began to crest the eastern sky and the shutters kicked on, then stopped 
before they fully closed.   A  single ray of sunshine spread across the room to 
touch the painting making the background in the painting glow with a life of its 
own.  Her eyes in the painting took on a ethereal glow created only by love and 
she  felt drawn into the picture.  She reached out to touch it and noticed the 
inscription.

Only Love Touched by the Light of Day Can Survive Eternity!
My Gift to You Without Regret!

Nicholas de Brabant Knight  1994

She collapsed in despair and wept at the base of the painting.


Epilogue 

------------

LaCroix paced the floor of the Raven, just as he had for the last hour.  Nicholas 
was in a state of total despair and he'd thwarted his father's efforts to find him.  
He had bid him farewell through their link knowing full well LaCroix would 
not let him end his own torment.  He couldn't live without her.  It was over and 
today he would end what he'd started 800 years ago.  It was the good doctors 
fault.  LaCroix downed yet another glass of blood as he paced when he heard 
her pounding on the door.

"LaCroix, let me in! "  Natalie screamed and pounded on the outer door.  If 
anyone knew where Nick was, it was LaCroix.  She wouldn't give him up 
without a fight.  If LaCroix killed her it was alright, because she wouldn't give 
Nick up without a fight...not now, not ever.  Finally, she went around the back 
and crawled through a window into the dark confines.  By rights she should 
have been terrified, but there wasn't time.

"LaCroix?"  She screamed at the top of her lungs.  "Help me!  Help me stop 
him!"  Pain was laced in her voice as she sobbed.  "Please!  I will do 
anything.....anything.  Make me your slave, bring me across, kill me....anything 
but help me find him!"  She collapsed to the floor once more in desperation.

He appeared behind her without a sound and watched the young woman before 
him.  Her memory had returned.  He should have known, her love for him was 
as strong as his son's for her.  Nothing can force that from one's mind for very 
long.  She sensed  him and turned still on her knees.  Her face streaked with 
tears and desperation written in her eyes.  He was certain his wasn't much 
better.  They were both going to lose him today.

"Help me find him, LaCroix.  I'll do anything you ask.  Just help me stop him 
before he does this.  We will both lose him if he walks into the sun...please."  
She crawled to him and humbled herself at his feet.  Her eyes searched his for 
hope that they could still find him alive.

This woman was the only thing that could stop his son and he knew it.  They 
may already be to late.  Quickly he grabbed his cloak.  He pulled her to his feet 
and wrapped them both in it, then flew straight through the window into the 
sunlight.

-------------


Minutes later they landed inside Nick's garage and LaCroix collapsed in agony.  
His blistered, smoldering skin wrenched all his strength away from him as the 
pain tore through him seeking it's own revenge.  "Go!"  He growled at her.  
"You are the only thing that can stop him.  He's come back to the only place 
that has brought him peace in 800 years.  He will do it here.  Stop him, 
Doctor....for both of us!"  He moaned and slipped into the darkness of a healing 
sleep.  

Nat ran the stairs two at a time and burst into the room.  Nick stood in the far 
corner already blistered from his flight home to his only place of refuge.  It was 
done.  He stepped into the bright sun and let it burn out the evil within him.  
The pain at least gave him freedom from the torment of remembering Nat in 
Locke's arms and he welcomed it.

"NOOOOOO!!!"  She ran across the room and pushed his smoldering body out 
of the sun.  The pain from the sun ate at his skin, but her voice tore his heart in 
two.  He'd waited until she left.  He didn't want her to see him like this....not 
like this.  She threw her body over his to protect him from the sun's rays that 
still penetrated the darkened corner.  "Please, Nick, don't do this!"  She looked 
for the remote and couldn't find it.  "Tell me where the remote is, Nick.  I love 
you, Nick....not Locke.  It was you I wanted in my bed, not him.  You are my 
dreams, it's our son I want, not Locke's.  Don't do this to us.  Give us a chance 
to find a way to be together."  She kissed him on his blistered lips then forced 
her tongue into his mouth.  He responded without thinking and pulled her into 
his arms and the passion they'd kept at bay for years exploded.  The sun burnt 
his skin as he wrapped them around her, and he couldn't feel anything but her 
love.  She raked her tongue across his sharp teeth causing it to bleed into his 
mouth.  With the first drop of her blood he sucked greedily and his fangs 
dropped.  Fear and pain coursed through him simultaneously as he pushed into 
the link between them.  Her love for him overwhelmed him and he was lost.  
She was in love with the man and the vampire.....and she didn't care which 
possessed her.  Forever, she would love him throughout eternity no matter what 
happened.  Her heart was his and only his.

He broke away from her as the pain became unbearable.  Her eyes met his.  "I 
can't survive without you.  Love me enough to try and find a way for us to be 
together.  There weren't just my dreams, Nick, they were yours too.  Love me 
enough to make our dreams into reality."  She needed him to fight for them, 
fight for what they both wanted.  It was their only chance. Her eyes waited for 
an answer and he reached behind him and pulled out the remote to close the 
shutters.  

"I have loved you since the day in the morgue when you didn't run away.  I will 
always love you, Natalie, but there may never be a way for us to be together 
unless I bring you across.  I love you enough to let you go on with your life.  
You can't do that as long as I'm here.  I'm a part of you just as you are a part of 
me and this isn't fair to you.  You have a right to the happiness and love of a 
family and a home.  I can't give that to you.  I may never be able to give that to 
you."  He held her head gently between his blistered hands and made her look 
at him.  "Never question that I love you....I did this to free us both....to give you 
back your life and end the torment of mine.  I want you to have that dream, to 
be happy, to be the wonderful mother I know you will be."  Pain tore at his 
heart as a single tear escaped her eye.

"You don't understand, do you, Nicholas Knight?  You are my dream, my 
fantasy, my reality.  Being with you no matter how is the only thing that makes 
me happy.  Don't you see, when LaCroix made me forget what we felt how it 
caused me such pain.  How I searched for the answer only to find it had been 
there right in front of me the whole time.  Love is the answer for both of us, no 
matter what form it takes.  As long as we are together we're whole."  She 
reached over to caress his blistered face and stopped with her fingers over his 
lips.  "These are mine."  She lightly rubbed her fingertips over his lips, then 
kissed him softly.  She released them and stared into his bright blue eyes.  
"Take my blood, Nick and let me heal you.  Let our love heal each other, then 
we can find all the answers together."  She raised her fingernail to her neck and 
racked it slowly down her throat, letting the blood pool freely on the cut and 
offered him her neck.

His fangs dropped and his eyes turned golden as they met hers.  Gently he 
caressed the soft skin on her neck and face.  He watched her eyes shine with 
trust and love and he knew he was no longer alone, that together they could 
conquer anything.  "I will love you forever, Natalie, no matter what happens 
between us.  In our dreams and our reality, we shall always be one."

The End

I know...I'm pathetic...sappy, disgusting and a true die hard NNPacker.....I can't 
help myself, so someone please shoot me and get it over with.  I wasn't going to 
post this piece except to my web page.  It was more a purge for my own 
depression caused by my shoulder injury but I was told by several people who 
will remain nameless at this point, that it was good enough to post....just not 
my usual style.  Thanks so much for reading and putting up with my own type 
of therapy.  

Author's Note:

If you enjoyed the story, why not read some more?
Come join the fun and visit my Fiction page at:
>http:www.plantnet.com/~nitewind/Fiction2.html
 
Better yet go UNDERCOVER & enjoy the ride with my new novel!
Available NOW in paperback, pdf & CD versions: See my webpage above!
Or go direct to the sources at:
>http://www.virtualbookworm.com/undercover
>http://www.amazon.com   Type in B.W. Starmer or UNDERCOVER
>http://www.barnesandnoble.com  Type in B.W. Starmer  

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